


A Brew-tea-full Friendship

by perniciousLizard



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Confession, M/M, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-06-01 00:49:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15131423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perniciousLizard/pseuds/perniciousLizard
Summary: Sans has a little crush.  But whohasn'thad a crush on the ex-king at some point?





	A Brew-tea-full Friendship

“Sans, uh….” Alphys’ voice on the other end of phone was tremulous with nerves. “Um, I…I have to…uh…”  She trailed off into silence.

“what’d you do?” Sans snorted.  He had no idea why Alphys had suddenly called out of the blue.  Whatever it was couldn’t be too bad, or she’d have sent him a text to avoid having to get the words out.

“I d-didn’t–I wouldn’t!  That’s - how could you think – ??”  Alphys broke off.  "Ok.  Ok, you’re right.  God.  I’m…so sorry.“  

"uhoh.” Sans still had no idea what was going on.

“I…god.  You told me that in confidence!  W-well, not exactly in confidence, but you were pretty drunk and I mean I don’t want people sharing whatever garbage pours out of my mouth when I’m a bottle under, right, so of course I’m not going to…of course I shouldn’t’ve…”  Alphys groaned.  "Please don’t get back at me by telling people the awful things I’ve said!  I didn’t mean them!"

"uh."  

"Promise?”

“nah.”

“Ok, I guess I deserve that.”  He heard Alphys take a deep breath.  "Ok!  So, I told Undyne about your crush on Asgore and I guess she told him so now that’s out of the bag, so, sorry!"

"what?”  Sans rubbed his skull.  "that’s it?  huh.  that really…gets my goat."  He chuckled.  

There were worse secrets, honestly.  Alphys had kept all the important ones.   So, whatever.  He’d only told her because it had seemed funny at the time.  He couldn’t even blame himself for sharing it.  

Three days a week he had tea with the ex-king.  He used to just go when it occurred to him, which hadn’t been very often.  It’d turned itself into a habit, though, and now he showed up like clockwork.  Asgore would be fresh from his garden washing his hands in the sink and all geared up to talk about petunias or the little danishes he’d gotten at the local bakery.  

There was nothing deep about any of this.  The king was good looking and Sans liked to spend time with him.  Maybe he was a little lonely in that particular way that didn’t go away when he had lots of platonic buddies to hang out with.  Asgore was perfect for that - handsome, kind, and  _completely_  unattainable.  

He could get little gifts for the guy at Gyftmas, come up with jokes he’d think he’d like, and he never had to worry about anything actually going anywhere.  Sans could have his little thing for the guy, and get what he needed out of that, and that was that.

"Are you…angry?”  Alphys asked.  "You don’t sound mad."

"nah, it’s ok. kind of funny, actually.  look, maybe it’ll be weird for twenty minutes, but, uh, i wouldn’t worry about it too much.  order me a pizza someday.  or, heh, tell me one of Undyne’s secrets or - nah, never mind.  don’t wanna know.”

“Ok.  I really am sorry, though."

"no big.  who doesn’t have a thing for the guy, anyway?”

“Right?” She laughed.  "We all have to go through at at some point."

"just a part of life."  

Maybe he should skip tea next week.  Asgore had a few days before Sans' usual visit to digest that information.  Sans’d expect Asgore to either have decided to ignore the news or be fully prepped with a "it’s not you it’s me” speech.  Nah, he’d go.  Sans kind of wanted to hear that.

He remembered when it had hit him that he had a thing for the old goat.  Sans had been a real good Samaritan and made sure the box of donuts at Frisk’s PTA meeting hadn’t gone to waste.  He and Asgore were going to town on what amounted to almost a full dozen, over tea.  

Asgore still had dirt on him from gardening, so Sans didn’t see the harm.  He went for a jelly donut and when the backside of the ‘nut squirted he managed to get the jelly to land right on Asgore’s nose.  

Asgore had gone crosseyed looking at it, and as he fumbled for a napkin, he accidentally crushed his own donut and ended up with crumbs littering his beard.  

“Oh, heavens, I’m a mess today,”  Asgore said, chuckling and patting at himself with napkins.  

“heh.  whoops,” Sans said.  "sorry about that.  you’re really… _crumb-_ ling to pieces, here."

Asgore broke into hearty laughter at what even Sans could admit wasn’t his best work. The sunlight streaming through the kitchen window hit the red jelly on Asgore’s face and lit up the golden flecks in his hair and Sans knew he was done.  

Anyway.  That was how things went, sometimes.

Sans wasn’t all that nervous in the leadup to their regular tea date.  He was curious. Asgore didn’t outright cancel, which he hoped meant Asgore wasn’t going to just stop hanging out with him.  That was the only way this could go that would actually hurt his feelings.

What would Asgore say?  He’d start out apologizing.  Maybe he’d get out the good tea Sans liked.

Sans rang the doorbell and waited.  It could sometimes be a pretty long wait, and he’d either just go in or he’d walk around back and find Asgore in the middle of a desperate battle with ivy or dozing off under the peach tree.  

This time, the door opened almost immediately.  Sans had expected Asgore to be in his usual work clothes, but he had on something that looked like it was ripped straight out of an LL Bean catalog.  

"uh, hi,” Sans said.  What was that smell, cologne?  Usually Asgore smelled like tea or flowers.  Sometimes like he’d been using fire magic.

“Howdy, Sans!” Asgore said, bright.  Sans noticed that his horns looked a little shiny, almost like he’d polished them.  His hair was damp.  He must have taken a shower before he pulled his shirt out of its packaging and put it on.  "Don’t stand around out here.  Come on in!"

"sure.  ok.”  This was… _different_  than he expected.  

“Let me pour us some tea,” he said.  Asgore seemed cheerful for a kiss off.  Maybe nervous?  Hoo boy.   “And then…I had something I wanted to discuss with you.”  He winked.

Sans wasn’t sure what to do.  He went in.  


End file.
